Train to Busan
Train to Busan (2016) – 1/10
I was promised a train ride. What I got was the worst public transportation experience in human history.
The train leaves on time, which is already unrealistic. Then, five minutes later, everyone starts turning into zombies. This is exactly why I prefer missing my train.
The zombies run faster than Olympic athletes. These people wake up one morning as ordinary citizens and suddenly become Usain Bolt with anger issues.
The main character spends the entire movie discovering that caring about other people is important. Sir, it took a zombie apocalypse for you to learn basic manners.
Every time I found a character I liked, the movie immediately deleted them from existence. The director apparently saw happiness and took it personally.
There is also one businessman who is so unbelievably annoying that I started rooting for the zombies. They were honestly doing community service.
The zombies somehow manage to invade every train car. I don’t know how. The train has more infected people than seats.
And the ending? I watched a zombie movie expecting mindless entertainment and somehow ended up questioning humanity and crying over a train journey. That was not part of the agreement.
Overall, Train to Busan is a film that proves public transportation can always get worse.