Detachment

i don’t usually feel the need to write somthing genuine in here about films but detachment truly left me with somthing to say. even with its partial flaws this movie truly caught me off guard in so many ways. This genuine devastation i felt from the start truly because i felt a sense of relatability in the strangest way. i think this movie silently felt like a punch to the gut. i don’t think this film is for everyone but i do think it shows a sadness that isn’t sort of performative ; yes it is a typical misery porn but it really did resonate with me.  I think the films use of these relationships whether that be henry’s relationship with his grand father, erika or meredith or even the other sub relationships in the films is so real. they’re used to show how much people are carrying no matter what the age. every relationship feels messy and incomplete and that’s exactly why they feel so real and relatable. henry’s relationship with his grandfather truly hit me deep. i think henry had always known there’s something dark or damaged connected to his grandfather because of everything that happened with his mother. It’s not blame exactly but there’s an understanding that there is an echo of guilt from henry’s grandfather that follows him to his deathbed and i think it’s such a painfully realistic kind of relationship.  we see a switch in dynamics where the young often take care of the old at every stage, of course henry looks after his father but eventually erika ends up looking after henry  in her own broken teenage way that i don’t think is very obvious. we often expect these age gap dynamics to be extremely clear where the young is entirely dependent on the old but while this is true there is a role reversal where she gives him a unconditional trust and care and she sees straight through him. Every character is reaching for something;understanding, comfort, escape and there’s something really painful and human in that, something that makes you feel exposed while watching it and left me in tears way to many times.  i think the school dynamic also adds a completely more gut wrenching level to it showing that school is so much more then a building but a genuine ecosystem that to some means absolutely nothing or everything, characters like meredith search for all their worth in the teachers and when henry doesn’t sort of give her the physical and emotional validation she needs, becomes one of many catalysts that lead to her suicide.i think the film captures 1. the failure of public schools but 2. how to the adults in teenage lives make a huge impact that these minor failures or discipline may feel routine to them but to teens can be brutally heartbreaking for a teenager.  And honestly, I still love the way it was filmed. The observational angle makes every moment feel uncomfortable and like you’re witnessing real people trying to hold themselves together which they all clearly are failing in their own ways at.  i have so so so much more to say about this movie but i would end up writing an absurd amount so ill leave it at that :,) detachment isn’t a film that tries to heal you. It just shows you the truth: and that is a thing that never ends up how we want it to be.  (i was totally gushing over adrian brody in this, i wanna sleep in his dusty apartment and let him treat me like a child …. so king if ur free hmu!)