Love Me

*PSIFF SCREENING #2 * “me is completely corny.”** i actually cannot believe it. i think we have found our worst film of 2025 barely a week into the new year. what an actual waste of time and horrible concept and execution of a film. i have no clue what kristin stewart and steven yeun saw in this but i would argue this might be bad enough to put them in acting jail for a bit. this film tries to be wall-e but void of the heart, beauty, and joy. this film tries to be funny but falls flat every single time. this film tries to be dramatic but just comes across as pathetic and boring. the film follows a sole buoy after the extinction of life on earth and them trying to connect with the sole satellite orbiting the earth. what starts as relatively tame and just uninteresting turns into a corporate mess and a film with a distinct lack of humanity despite that being the objective of the film to begin with. the film quickly turns into animation with animated human versions of the buoy and satellite, and this animation is the majority of the runtime. to keep it brief, the animation looks straight out of the metaverse and almost feels like it is intentionally marketing such. there is also several minutes of screen time dedicated to blue apron meal plan product placement. with characters being artificial, you would hope that everything surrounding them isn’t as the saving grace. me (the buoy) is constantly manipulating and complaining about their place in the world and it is beyond uninteresting to listen to and there are no real redeeming qualities of the character. iam (the satellite) is naive and even when he starts to find the “humanity” within itself, it is never explored beyond “oh i guess water tastes good now that i am living my life.” like i am so sorry if this review is incoherent and dumb but it is only fair i review this film in a manner that reflects its quality. visually, even outside of the animation, this film is ugly and never has its own distinct vision of what the end of the world would actually be like. the score is generic piano stuff that never crescendos or provokes even a bit of emotion when it tries to. i could complain all day about my experience with this film but i think what tells you all you need to know is the following: a man was loudly snoring during the second half of the film and nobody told him to be quiet or wake up. he honestly was better off missing the film i had the displeasure of viewing. such an unfortunate beginning to psiff but tomorrow is looking much brighter.