GuySavage108

While this is probably the best of the Tom Holland films, it's still a step below any of the Raimi directed films. Hell, I'd much sooner make a case for Spider-man 3 than this film. There are some good moments here, some nice character interactions, some good laughs. Half of this is a competent Spider-man movie, and the other half is an overstuffed narrative to help set up the X-Men making their fast approach into the franchise. It's funny looking back at the fan theories and speculation, the people assuming that Sink was playing Typhoid Mary. No, of course it was gonna be Jean Grey. It's a redheaded psychic, and they've already announced multiple X-Men actors appearing in Doomsday. [Sorry to anyone who got their hopes up that Daredevil would make an appearance in this film because the Hand is here. Daredevil would be too cool for this movie.] Also, the trailer does and doesn't give everything away. My suspicions that the rogues gallery screenshots were just that: screenshots. A quick montage to show that Spidey's been busy since we last saw him. And yet again, we get another MCU Spidey film where he doesn't get his own villain. I guess Marvel Studios couldn't find any other reason to make the MCU citizens hate mutants when they finally debut, so they had to make Jean a villain so that when more mutants are revealed, the traumatized NY citizens will remember that a mutant was the one who hurt them, which means all mutants will be "bad". Which is fair, because there's no way Jean did not cause a few dozen deaths in this film. Do you remember the guy she made step out in front of a taxi? After three films as Iron Boy, it's finally been decided that we should have MCU Spidey go through a mish mash of events evocative of Spider-man 2 and 3. Where he questions the sacrifices he's forced to make, while also being moody and strong and scared of his own power. It's fine. It's handled about as well as I can expect the MCU to treat it. Punisher just seems to be here to be a mirror to Pete, show him what he could become if he remains an isolated loser stuck in his past. Also, was I supposed to believe for a second that Peter might've died? Cause there were people in my theater like, crying when Peter collapses and Frank carries him to the hospital. Was I supposed to be afraid of him dying, cause I wasn't. No way a MCU movie could ever convince me they were prepared to kill off their cash cow. Bruce Banner is here, as is the Hulk, filling a role that could've honestly been filled by another Spider-man character. A college professor suppressing a "monster" who acts as a brief mentor to Pete. Could've made it Dr. Connors/the Lizard, someone that Spider-man already defeated, but is now taking a redemptive approach. Oh wait, they couldn't because they already used ASM's Lizard in NWH. At least the MCU knows better than to reheat the same nachos over and over again...I guess. But yeah, Bruce is MOSTLY here as a course correction. We get mention that Jean "broke" something in him, now undoing everything the MCU has done with the character since Endgame and reverting him back to his original incarnation, Savage Hulk. Which, I'm sort of fine with because I love Savage Hulk (especially after reading Immortal Hulk), but my hopes remain low because I've learned to never expect another Hulk film. Story wise, Bruce is here because Peter's body is changing and leaking white fluid, and he needs to talk to a handsome, mature college professor about getting things into check. Which leads to Peter realizing he needs to make his own inhibitor chip that targets his arachnid DNA, like how Banner's targets his Gamma radiation affected DNA. And somehow, Peter can make a universal one, that can target any anomalous DNA, which I guess is to imply it can suppress Jean's mutant X-gene, even though no one should know what that is yet. And Peter only makes one chip. Which would make you reasonably believe that's why Hulk is actually here, because obviously Peter has to choose whether to use the chip on Jean or Hulk, and he chooses Hulk. But that's when the movie subverts your expectations and reveals that the chip won't work on Hulk cause his skin is too thick. But that's okay, cause Spidey just has to go "hey Hulk it's me, your friend, Peter" and Hulk gets big sad. I don't know why, because these two haven't been shown to have interacted once in any of the films. But hey, at least Peter can still use the chip to use on Jean. My thing is out of all the X-Men characters to use as a tease, why Jean? Sure, her and Spidey have crossed paths when he's hung out with the X-Men as a whole. But, they've never been close. They've never been enemies. Like, Logan is probably the closest to Peter, and sometimes Peter gets advice from Prof. Xavier. Also, we made her sister a mutant, because reasons? Also, at what point am I supposed to feel sorry for Jean? Is it after we find out that her sister took her to the park to teach her how to CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE AND ROB THEM OF THEIR AUTONOMY? It reminds me of the ending of WandaVision where the narrative is telling me I'm supposed to feel sympathetic for her, but I don't. Like Damage Control are not the good guys, but also, how else would her sister, Sarah, be on their radar if she was not up to some nefarious shit, right? There's moments in the film that still suffer from the old "we just had a big emotions scene, time to undercut it with awkward joke" problem that's plagued the franchise for a while. A lot of the dialogue and moments very heavy handed and predictable. It's very convenient that Peter's memory of Aunt May has such open ended and ambiguous dialogue that it can apply to Spider-man and Jean Grey. MCU MJ has probably felt the most developed she has so far. Sorry again to people who thought Sadie Sink would play the "real" MJ. Also, very funny to hear MJ be described as "dark and twisted". Because when? Where? Lol. Lmao even. Reminds me of the Jughead "I'm werid. I'm a weirdo" clip from Riverdale. I don't know. For every good joke, good fight sequence, or good character interaction, there's a plot hole, nonsensical turn of events, or glaring CG sequence that undoes the optimism I had for this film. At a runtime just shy of two and a half hours, it just doesn't feel earned. Overall, I had a decent time. There are good moments, and I will admit, I was happy to see some actual cinematography (and lighting) that was missing from prior MCU entries. There are some great shots and compositions here, and real locations. I don't hate this film. If anything I'm just disappointed. The blatant product placement got old fast, especially when we get a full view of BERO, the non-alcoholic beverage co-founded by Tom Holland. Is this a terrible movie? No. Do I have any desire to watch it again? No. I've got my 4K collection of the Raimi movies to satiate my need for Spidey. But, I have to give credit where credit is due and acknowledge that real effort was put here and it does show.

A Giallo inspired J-slasher that can be honestly be such a visual treat at times. Has some interesting vibes, and while I did have fun, this film is a bit tedious. The story is mostly indecipherable with small fragments being drip fed. There's probably 50 solid minutes of a workable film in a 100 minute runtime unfortunately. Also, while I do like the theme song, it's definitely an earworm, it gets used to a comedic degree here. It's so overplayed. There's one part where explosions go off and you can hear the theme just restarting after each explosion. Also, there's a very gratuitious rape scene in the middle of the film that really amounts to nothing. Like, I'm not opposed to feeling uncomfortable or uneasy while watching a film, and I've seen films where sexual assault is an *important* part of the narrative. Keyword being important. Here it just feels exploitative and mostly to serve as shock value and it goes on just way too long. Luckily it wasnt too graphic but I really had to fight the urge to turn the movie off.

I'm relieved that Michael Mann made the film Heat, because otherwise I would be spoiled for choice on what his best film is. Thief, Collateral, Miami Vice, and I'll even throw Blackhat in the mix. There's not a Mann film I don't like, though I can understand if someone can't get behind the Keep. This film is gorgeous, sleek, stylish, pure sex in a digital voyeuristic way. Mann is one of the few directors that made the jump to digital early on and learned to utilize it to suit his vision. Some other directors include David Lynch and David Fincher. I don't know how you see something like this and don't think it's good. Not "well, it's good for digital". No, it's just good.