2/Duo

nooo nooo nooo why do we make loving each other harder than it should be?????? what is it huh? ego? alienation? self-hatred? or the harrowing nature of what love is supposed to be? even beneath all that, it's still love, right? is the toxicity of love diluted with some kind of heavenly sweetness that people are so prone to brewing whatever scenarios necessary to bring about a strain in the happiness they own? i could never romanticise hurting someone i love; but sometimes, i try my best to think about how people do the most horrible things to the one person that they genuinely love the most. distance blooms in our barren land as you sow them with your lonesome ways, the thorns that prick forbid us from relying on each other in our gloomy days. with naive expectations, i tell you enamored tales from our past lives--everything including the smothering regrets i have honed from one era to the other--my fear of being lost between wanting to die and not wanting to live. in reply, you kiss me with your broken-chapped lips; disgustingly dripping blood from small cuts, only to chafe those parts of my skin afterward. the way you overlook the little efforts makes my smile wilt into a cry; but why is it only the sky you painted where my wings agree to fly? shredded in shame but hoping for love, i think of you in my darkest hours--even cut pieces of my heart and give them to you wrapped within shiny bouquets of flowers. but no, the world is much more scented for you even to feel the foul of my blood with a sniff; leaving you morosely unaware that i'd already started dying, way before we jumped off that cliff. but these are all just words from the lungs of my longing because no one else could ever love anyone the way you love me. even if you make me feel like you're ignorant at your very core, your sleepless heart visibly struggles without the melody of our lovelore. so, i'll keep straying into the warmth of your hold, never having to let go as wherever we are--it'll always be cold