Boogie Nights

Overview: A star is born, or should I say porn. Marky Mark has a massive dick and it helps him find his chosen family. Best Performance: Julianne Moore, Burt Reynolds’s, John C Reilly, Don Cheadle, and Philip Seymour Hoffman.  Best Scene: When Philip Seymour Hoffman tries to kiss Mark Wahlberg and then has a meltdown in the car because it’s unrequited love, I felt that. Worst Thing About the Movie: The fucking firecrackers giving me a heart attack for three minutes straight. Special Shout-out: The music. Obviously the music and the choreographed disco sequence. Thought I Had While Watching: God I need to watch Babylon again. The perfect dead cocaine body at a party scene. Role Anne Hathaway Should Have Played: Dirk Diggler’s HORRIBLE mother.