Karachats

I feel nothing. It was bound to happen considering the first was so perfect and iconic on top of nostalgic, the sequel 2 decades later had nowhere to go but down. The Devil Wears some ugly ass Bullshit is absolutely a product of modern audiences not being able to accept that a bad character will have bad behavior. First Buzzfeed feminism convinced people Miranda ISN'T an absolutely disrespectful, demeaning, and abusive pos of a boss but rather a *•°totally valid girlboss°•*, now she's been completely stripped of her claws. She's no longer the hbic, she's victimized and scared and slightly rude but mostly harmless, and far more outwardly emotional and apologetic. Characters don't get to be assholes or bitches anymore because including that is seen as condoning it, so every antagonist or villain has to be sympathetic (even though there were absolutely sympathetic moments in the first one that worked without trying to absolve her of her behavior). The other characters are blown to smithereens too: Andy is this doe-eyed, somehow still totally naive and validation-seeking character but now worse because she has a hero complex and cries whenever she can't save everyone. Emily also loses her bite and is more nice but less confident in herself and her abilities, leaving her feeling sad and slightly pathetic. Don't even get me started on Nigel, who's a former shell of his original character. He's basically only there to support Andy, all his own passion and personality and ambitions dialed way down to make room for the mess of a plot. Speaking of which, were they throwing darts at a wall of scrapped script ideas? I can get behind Andy losing her job and Miranda simultaneously jeopardizing her position, but Miranda's floundering and lack of grace or control is a shame to her character. Andy gets an assistant who could be replaced by a roomba with no bearing on the plot, there's some famous lady who's famous for who-knows-what that shows up to say "I'm engaged!" and then disappears, Irv randomly dies in the middle of the movie because they couldn't come up with a better way to forward the conflict, Emily, Andy, and Miranda all have relationships that I could not possibly care about less if I tried, an attempted commentary on the battle between true art and social media and profit that they don't commit to, there's a random AI bit like 3/4 in that comes from nowhere and goes nowhere, Gaga is here for some reason, and worst of all no one learns anything or grows at all in this movie. Emily goes from designer retail to designer retail, Andy goes from journalist to journalist, all the assistants stay assistants and Miranda goes from Editor to Content Manager or whatever the fuck but ultimately like the first movie which cared enough to show us the magnitude of Miranda's duties, this one doesn't bother so I am entirely unimpressed and unmoved by her promotion. She went from being in charge to being in charge, whoop-de-doo. My last gripe is all the visual stuff: First, what the actual fuck were the outfits in this movie??? Jesus almost everyone looked like a hot fucking mess for SO much of this, it's like it completely forgot it's a movie about fashion. From that hideous THING Andy wore to the weekend getaway to the half a chain mail suit or curtain tassel jacket Miranda wore to whatever the hell Emily had going on at the funeral. Just awful, awful outfits that had me in the theater with my head in my hands. Second, the cinematographer needs to figure their shit out. Some scenes looked like a bland commercial, some were doing this awkward pan in or way out, some were shaky like the camera might be in a mockumentary? It was just odd, inconsistent, and didn't flow at all. Overall this movie is total buns, as I fully expected. It has no edge, no solid message, no real point. Immediately after standing up from my seat I could already feel the movie fading from my memory, just a total blank on something that was two entire hours for some reason. I'm glad it's forgettable, so I can continue enjoy the first one for the masterpiece that this shallow, poorly written disappointment of a sequel could never hope to be. Only gave it 2 stars instead of lower because its lack of any punch or edge left me feeling disappointed but still unoffended. I wasn't angry walking out just confused and unmoved.

I signed up for a silly mystery movie for kids, why did it make me cry like five times. Usually movies for children kneecap their language or otherwise soften the themes so it's easier to digest but this movie directly shows and openly discusses death, freely showing the characters grapple with the reality of mortality and the weight of grief. It still managed to be joyous and light though, at the right moments. Honestly I watched this because I just needed a mindless distraction from my personal stressors but this waaayy surpassed my expectations.

This stressed me out too bad bc I also didn't have boundaries or the ability to stand up for myself as a teen for fear of being unlikable and alienating myself. I'm irritated af Devon didn't beat Celeste's ass, her getting smoke inhalation damage and cut off by her dad was honestly not personal enough, that girl needed to get directly fucked up by Devon for everything she did but yk whatever ig the eay they did it was more true to Devon's character. Devon and her brother were SO cute (honestly her whole family was and I loved how fun her dad was). Love cute realistic siblings in movies they're so adorable in this. Also Megan too me out at the end like what are you doing here!! Her and Devon were so cute, I loved the montage endings.

I'm woke sorry the immigrant + predatory lesbian jokes were naaawwtt funny and I already thought so back when it came out </3 But I do love Beca and Chloe being egregiously homosexual at everybody. This movie is still fun and the performances are still great. Bringing out the previous Bellas always gets me. Also Jesse is way too good for Beca sorry, but I still wanna be them as a couple's costume. I'm probably giving this a higher rating than it deserves but, nostalgia idk.