Aftersun

Don't you ever feel like you've just done a whole amazing day, and then you come home and feel tired and down, and feels like your bones don't work? They're just tired and everything is tired. Like you're sinking. We often think about our parents just as our parents, forgetting they're their own persons too, with their own problems and traumas and memories and lives. Once we see the individual and set them aside from the role they're supposed to play, things change. A lot. It usually doesn't happen until very later in life. I'm going to get a little vulnerable here and say that I'm so freaking scared of being a mom one day and fuck it all up trying to be good, or fucking myself up. Maybe I'm just too mentally ill, maybe I'm just too damaged by my own parents, just like they were by theirs... Or maybe I'm just too young to know a damn thing about anything at all. Hopefully it's the latest. Hopefully things get better and change in the future. I'm too much of a bleeding heart for these kind of films, yet I subject myself to them constantly, and honestly? I do not regret it one bit. This movie just touches the right spots in my soul and heart.