Manic

Lyle, wherever you’re going you’re still gonna be there. Yep, I do like my movies devastatingly raw. Nothing ever changes. Except you. You live with yourself first, in a fucked-up world second. Of all the people, Lisa Rowe's (from Girl, Interrupted) words came to my mind: "You changed the scenery, but not the fucking situation". Focus on your change. Everything felt real. The shaky hand-held camera was a silent observer in the room, catching the unfiltered, uncomfortable moments. No polish, no staging. People, breaking apart. Those close-ups of eyes, truly a window to one’s soul, were so powerful, intimate. The characters didn’t feel acted, more like people I’ve met, or could’ve been. That same authenticity carried into the dialogue. It was strikingly realistic and natural. Conversations drifting from Batman vs. Wolverine to life’s heaviest "why?" questions: the meaning of it all, the hopelessness, futility, the relentless cycles of destruction, and the unbearable stillness of waiting for something, anything to get better. It pulled me in, I felt like engaging with the characters directly, speaking up in therapy. I felt there.I could’ve had those same conversations with my friends. Maybe I already have. Maybe I will again. I look forward to them, despite how hard they can be, even when I can’t articulate my thoughts properly, or at all. Sometimes especially then.