Aftersun

absolutely impossible to get over this movie. i have such a deep emotional and personal connection to this movie. already started crying just watching calum and sophie's relationship cuz it reminded o fmy dad and I's. they made me feel jealous for a bond that i don't have with my father. when i was kid i had a this distinct cry where i would hyperventilate profusely when i cried. when i cried i cried hard and i literally couldnt stop it no matter what, that was just my cry. anyway i grew out of it and these past few years i didnt cry like that anymore, completely forgot about it. anyway, when i finished the movie i was crying the way i used to cry when i was younger. full on hyperventilating and sobbing. brought me back to the kid i was when it was mostly just my dad and i, when our relationship was at its prime. we both grew out of that phase of our lives but this movie brought me back. this movie completely broke me to pieces. this made me feel. 20 mins into the movie i was pretty scared for what was gonna happen cuz it all seemed to be going perfect and i just expected someone to die. last 20 mins of the movie i realised that no one seems to have cancer or anything so i was getting intrigued. ffs i never realised what the heck calum was going through. and now i listen to Under Pressure in the shower every day.