Drive My Car

I watched this for the first time on my birthday shortly after it came out, and so I guess it's sort of becoming a tradition for me to watch this on my birthday every year. When I first watched this, I don't think I had any idea of how influential this film would end up being for me. I sort of watched it at just the right time in my life where I really connected with the themes and characters in the film. In all honesty, I probably wouldn't be going to film school right now if I didn't watch this film. So I guess you could say it was sort of a life changing film for me. What I find so fascinating with this film is how the dialogue between the characters almost becomes the main focus over the narrative itself in such a unique way. Not only does the cassette tapes he uses to rehearse his lines act as a sort of seance for him to communicate with his deceased wife, it also acts as a sort of subtext for us to understand the characters. In a way the dialogue is both the text and the subtext. Kafuku is Vanya and Vanya is Kafuku. So much of this film is simply shot-reverse-shot of the actors rehearsing their lines, but it works because of how layered the dialogue feels. The scenes in the car are shot and edited in such a simple way, but it works because there is something so inherently cinematic about cars in film. Yet Hamaguchi strips most of this away in the third act and what he get is a very tender heartfelt moment of bonding between Kafuki and Misaki, where they bond over their shared feelings of guilt, grief, and regret. It's such a beautiful and emotional moment of pure human connection. But then we go back to Vanya at the end, and he shows us that it is possible to move on from the past, that we can forgive ourselves, and that we don't have to carry our guilt and regrets with us for the rest of our lives. When I first watched this film, there was one scene at the end of the second act that really stood out to me. I think it is still my favorite scene in the movie. Where Takatsuki and Kafuku are having a conversation in the car, and Takatsuki confesses that he is empty, that there is nothing inside of him. He then recites the ending to Ota's films script and in that moment we get a look into who he is because just like with the play Uncle Vanya, Ota's film script acts as a sort of subtext to the inner feelings of Takatsuki. And in that regard, by reciting the ending of her film, he is laying bare his soul to Kafuku and for us to understand. After dropping Takatsuki off at the hotel, both Kafuku and Misaki smoke on the drive back to Kafuku's hotel. This is perhaps one of the most cathartic scenes in the film. I know I will never have to smoke myself, because no cigarette I would smoke would ever be as cathartic as the ones they smoke in that scene. The close-up shot of them holding the cigarettes out the sun roof while they drive at night, with the ambient music playing, it's just so beautiful. I love this film so much. I feel like I could sit down forever and breakdown every scene of this film and why it is so good and what it means. But I think what is most important is that I felt every emotion in this film and it was beautiful.