Aftersun

When you were eleven, what did you think you would be doing now? It's often dawned on me in my 20 years of life that I really don't know much about my dad past his natural relationship with me. It's a privilege to even be in a position where there are two, let alone any active parents in my life, but I've never felt like I've understood Dad. I don't think I'm alone in anticipating that this film was building to a big, shocking moment for Calum, one that would fully explain just what was happening in his brain, what was tearing him apart, what Sophie couldn't see and was looking for all those years later. A big scene where Calum leaves, commits suicide, anything that would explicitly explain the distinct melancholy of the film. The restraint in not showing anything and leaving everything up to perception was an incredible choice from director Charlotte Wells. What a devastatingly beautiful film. There are things you just don't pick up on when you're younger. Things that can't be rewound on tape or stored forever. Things you just can't see until you can understand it so much later. I wonder about every time I saw my parents alone with their thoughts in my youth. What were they thinking? What does it take to parent someone like me? How much did they sacrifice for me? Wells puts these ideas onto the screen like I've never seen before. Paul Mescal is subtly devastating, one of the most well rounded actors of this generation: capable of playing a charmer, a goof, an earnest man, a man hiding deep secrets, he can do anything. It's his blank stares that really convey a lot in this film. Frankie Coiro is a revelation. One of the most mature and thoughtful performances by an actor of her age ever put to screen. Every subtle expression, every word read exactly the right way. A powerhouse actor who I hope to see make big waves in the future. 1080p Blu-ray from Madman in 5.1 DTS-HD surround. Not necessarily a film you'd think of as a quintessential "surround sound experience", but the mix is absolutely incredible for this one. The sound of the ocean waves, the score, the ambience of the vacation resort, all perfectly put together for a surreal immersion into a nostalgia world, one that doesn't exist the way you really remember it. The Under Pressure scene is one of the most incredible moments I've experienced so far with this surround setup. Absolutely incredible. Will need to re-watch this, I imagine that'd be a wholly different experience. The tears nearly fell, but I think they'll become a waterfall on watch two. *This is our last dance This is ourselves*