Magnolia

Don't ever let anyone ever say to you, 'You shouldn't regret anything.' Don't do that, don't! You regret what you fucking want! And use that, use that, use that regret for anything, any way you want. You can use it, okay? Second ever PTA. I think I get it now. They put this guy on our planet to never make a bad piece of art. Man. You ever finish watching a film and just break down cry-laughing out of exasperation over what you've seen? You now know that you've been affected forever by this film? That this film will be revisited for years to come, through your highs and lows? That's this film, right now for me. A magnetic, sprawling, and addictive film. I truly love when a film doesn't even really try and hit you with traditional tear-jerkers, just endless moments that make you think about your life in its totality, how beautiful and awful it can be to experience being alive. I mean, I was thinking about shit that honestly isn't great to remember, but I must remember it because it's just my being. This is my self, in totality. You must remember it happened, because it is what informs your soul. I was thinking about the first boy I had a real, long crush on. It never went anywhere and it was a weird and ugly and painfully uncoordinated pubescent attraction. Forgetting about it in the moment is easy, but erasing it completely from my memory is hard because it was just so formative. I saw a photo of him recently and can't say I didn't feel something about it. But there's always something that comes after the bad, the clear skies after the rain. There's always something. There has to be hope. And that doesn't come without what happened before. This is truly a very showy film. There's a lot of great stuff done behind and in front of the cameras. It's a great achievement in technical filmmaking, and the blistering pace of the three hours is genuinely incredible. But I just truly love how PTA depicts being human. Every part of this film feels so genuine and true and wonderful. Humanity is as simple as it is complex, and Anderson knows exactly how to balance that. Even that first hour. Honestly, there's so many moments in this film where they could've easily ended on a dour note, a sad ending, a "real" ending, but I love PTA's commitment to giving these characters a happy ending in their own ways. Wonderful. I'm hosting a game show soon for an assessment. Hope it isn't quite like the one in this film. Maybe I'll be the Filipino Alex Trebek! Or maybe I'll just be the original me. I really do have love to give! I just don't know where to put it!