Comingled Containers

Watched this again and it is becoming one of my favorite pieces of art, but I'm actually pretty bored at work so I'm going to use this to ramble about random stuff because I can. I was bored, and because I have nothing better to do since I'm not paying for NBA League Pass, I was scrolling through Letterboxd and sorted my reviews from earliest first. I downloaded Letterboxd in I think 2021. Reading them back, some of them are actually very funny, but man, I was saying fuck in almost every review. I pretended like I knew what I was talking about, had fun and kept track of everything I watched. It's 2024 now and I'm 22 years old. I graduated from university with a degree in film, and now I work full time as a General Manager of a art house cinema in my Cape Cod town. (And I still keep track of everything I watch) In Cape Cod, especially during the offseason, it consists of almost entirely older people, which is great! They worked hard enough to be able to retire and relax on the elbow (White privilege too, but anyways). I'm very grateful I live here. There's no night life, no parties and between me and you, not even many people to meet online in the area. I want things these so bad, but I it all balances out. I have one coworker as well as maybe a half dozen volunteer workers, I live with my family and it's very quiet. During the summer, I work two jobs: General Manager and Server, clocking up to 70 hours a week sometimes. My best friends live in either New York, New Jersey or far-away Massachusetts. Or Maryland. I've kind of learned to be content by myself, which has been quite the task. I got out of a relationship maybe 10 months ago and I finally am just cool. I see my friends very sparingly, but when I do see them, I let them know how much I love them. My mom still does my laundry, and I thank her for that. This has been quite the yap session, but I guess what this film has helped me with is recognizing that, in simplest form, I am an animal. I don't mean that in a "let's hit the gym" type way, because that is the last place I want to be. But I am an animal. I should have three meals a day. Today I have eaten two cookies, a Snickers bar and a beer after I threw up my morning coffee. I should drink lots of water. I chug a huge glass of water every morning, but I could definitely do that more. Probably (definitely) too much beer too. It's good to get outside and exercise. I went on a run not long ago! I overdid it and almost barfed, and haven't gone since. My screen time is as high as it's ever been, and when I'm working, I could spend up to 11 hours in the same small building. A lot of days, more often than not, I try my best to stay busy, and I think that is why my screen time is so far up. I try to watch movies, I play the new 2k, I watch YouTube videos, I go to the cinema whenever possible, I go out to eat by myself all the time and I just keeping doing. I fear that when I'm not doing, kind of right now, I get a friendly reminder of how my brain works. I wouldn't want my brain any other way, but shit it gets hard. I would like the think I'm pretty nice, people tell me that a lot. But in the back of my head, I think I do that and behave that way because of all the shit that is going through it. Without even addressing the elephant in the room that is the nightmare of capitalism and it's destruction of society, I'm just sad a lot. So when I get a chance to not be sad, I jump all over it. Maybe that is how everyone operates, or maybe I'm ignoring the obvious. This world is a living nightmare. It's pretty bad for me, but what makes me feel even worse is that I am an upper-middle class cis white man who lives in the suburbs. I am SO privileged, but this gets kind of tough. I am an animal. We will keep spinning around the sun, I will keep waking up in the morning, I'll continue to go about my day, bad shit will continue to happen, and none of it will stop. My new tattoos are sick though, that's for sure. Not that anybody is reading, but this yap session turned out less happy than I anticipated, which I think says a lot about not only this film but my current state of mind. But I just wanted to be clear: I am very happy. Plus I'm handsome Am I thriving? Clearly not. But what Comingled Containers reminds me is that the water keeps flowing. I can be grateful for that, and I can be grateful for whatever the water happens to drag along with it. The water keeps flowing. The water keeps flowing.