Birth

Criterion Spine #1298 “What happened to me was not my fault. There's no way I could have behaved any differently, you now... What I did wasn't my fault. What happended to me wasn't my fault, and I can't be held accountable for it. There is no way I could ever have said to him 'Go away'.I couldn't do it... It was a mistake. And... I'm sorry. But I want to be with you. I want to be with you. Yes, I do. And I want to get married, and... I wanna have a good life, and I wanna be happy. That's all I want - peace.” I think this is such a masterfully crafted film that has so many elements to discuss, starting with the score and the opening. You’d think something good is about to happen because the tunes are so charismatic and sound enchanting, but you’re seeing grey, dull, depressing winter in New York on screen. This reminded me so much of the Kubrickian style in Safe (1995), where all the scenes are pan-zoomed and exaggerated. To me, it seemed like that greyness and depression were lasting throughout those ten years and she’s grieving the entire time. There’s no light of day at any point in this film, even in May during the spring. Also like Safe, she’s completely disassociating from everyone around her when she encounters this bizarre situation, a situation full of dissonance but she can’t seem to help herself. Then the score at the points where she’s disassociating sounds like a dream tune being played from a celesta or those little colorful bells we used to have as kids, I forgot the name. All while she has a husband who doesn’t get it at all, trying to be secure from the beginning but starting to lose his shit as well and that’s what makes her performance so good to me, especially that beautifully disheartening ending scene, because I’d never feel sympathy for someone claiming this is happening to them in real life but I felt so bad for her at the end, she had to move on with her new life but everything was still grey. I think losing a loved one and yearning for them, getting a glimpse of them in any form, is irresistible. Lil bro put on a show too and Anne Heche is so underrated in this. Finishing this a rewatching the opening scene to wrap it up is also the best way to watch this. Let me say this. If I lost my wife and, and uh, the next day a little bird landed on my windowsill, looked me right in the eye, and in plain English said, 'Sean, it's me, Anna. I'm back' What could I say? I guess I'd believe her. Or I'd want to. I'd be stuck with a bird.