Aftersun

"i think its nice that we share the same sky" this movie is so incredibly beautiful. i don't know much about movies and that stuff, but i think this is very beautifully made. i love the colors and the color palette of the movie, and just all the deep conversations connect so personally to you. watching how sophie watches the couples during her vacation is so personal because i too watched teenage couples (not in a creepy way) when i was younger, imagining myself in their shoes. what would i do if I had a partner? would i love them? do shows, movies, music, art and other aspects of life correctly express how teenage love and just love in general feels like? its crazy how, now that i'm entering junior year, i will never experience (never say never, but a very low possibility) just the innocence of teenage love. its crazy to think that our parents grapple with the same emotions as us. when i look at me parents, i feel like i see them as all knowing and theyre fine. i think this movie does a great job at what its doing, and what it shows. its so incredibly heartbreaking knowing, and partially living through it, that people go through daily life wanting to walk into the ocean and never be seen again. i didnt know the song but the "this is our last dance" (its by david bowie i now know) while they danced in one of the ending scenes literally destroyed me and made me realize this whole movie was sophie processing her dad's death, which was probably suicide by the amount of times his depression was shown and him like standing on ledges, or walking infront of a bus. I KNEW I WASNT CRAZY. i wanted to cry so bad like i feel like my emotions are so pent up right now. then it flashed to one of the last scene which was a video of sophie and her dad laughing. it truly makes me filled with happiness that people find passions like making movies, but also filled with anger because what do you mean this has been sitting in my watchlist for over a year and i am only NOW watching it... ive lost my appetite, but i cant cry. i truly cannot cry. give me 5-10 business days to recover