oana

but i'm a cheerleader (1942 german military academy edition)

why are we acting like every Star Wars project needs to rewrite the galaxy, reveal 14 new sith lords, and personally resurrect Anakin Skywalker just to be considered “valid”? SEVEN YEARS. we waited SEVEN YEARS for a new Star Wars movie just for the gatekeeping elitists on this app to throw a temper tantrum because the space wizard movie didn't have a galaxy ending cosmic threat to satisfy their bloated expectations. ​i am officially diagnosing half the people on this GODFORSAKEN app with chronic, terminal FATHERLESSNESS. some of y'all have massive, unresolved daddy issues and it literally shows in your reviews. if your first instinct after watching Pedro Pascal and his tiny green son traverse the galaxy is to sprint to Letterboxd and cry about a lack of shiny laser swords, you don’t need a new Star Wars movie, you need therapy. while y'all were busy writing 1 star reviews because "Disney bad," i was in the theater crying five separate times and experiencing ABSOLUTE CINEMA. PURE FUCKING PEAK. i walked out of the theater feeling like a kid again. isn't that what Star Wars is supposed to do? ​the whole thing felt exactly like one of those chaotic d&d sessions where nothing major actually happens to the main plot but it doesn’t even matter because the vibes are immaculate and everyone is having the time of their lives. if you are trashing this movie, you are not a real fan, you just have massive relationship issues you're projecting onto a beautiful film about a dad and his tiny green son. ​the score was INSANE. the visuals were gorgeous. Din Djarin remains one of the coolest characters in the franchise. people are just hating to hate at this point because they’re mad Disney owns Star Wars and new people are allowed to have FUN. ​"it adds nothing to the story" is such a joke? Grogu literally dropped the most crucial lore of the century by teaching us how to construct a whole mud house. hgtv is SHAKING, he is truly the architect of a generation. LORE DROPPED, DEAL WITH IT. ​but for real his growth was so beautiful. he’s not just a cute little puppet who devours random frogs and immediately passes out for three business days the second he uses the force anymore. his training with Luke clearly paid off and they gave him a real, independent, hilarious personality. he is so small he only needs one single piece of popcorn and i want to put him in my jacket pocket and never let him go. that scene where he was healing Mando was the most adorable and emotionally devastating thing Star Wars has done in ages. ​somehow Pedro Pascal continues his world domination campaign by playing everyone's favorite space dad. the AURA FARMING in this movie was done EXTREMELY right. Mando is such a badass. the opening scene was so tuff. i genuinely thought Din was going to die at one point and cried like five times, but our man made it. sometimes you just need your dad, you know? (side note: by now we've established that haters are just dadless and projecting their own father issues, sorry not sorry). ​plus Rotta the Hutt being an absolute king was such a pleasant surprise. giving him a story after the Clone Wars was a brilliant move, and the fact that he’s actually a good guy and wants absolutely nothing to do with Jabba’s criminal empire and just wants to earn a name based on respect rather than fear is so TUFF. i think Jeremy Allen White did a good job at voicing him. also Zeb showing up was such a fun surprise too. i had no idea he was going to appear and i was losing my mind. Zeb is the GOAT. (i'm so happy we're bringing Rebels back, i loved that show.) AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE MARTIN SCORSESE CAMEO?! i literally recognized him immediately just by his voice. hearing a random character drop a whole thick ass New York accent in the middle of outer space was the funniest thing i have ever experienced in a theater. cinema recognizing cinema. ​it’s easily the best thing we’ve gotten since Rogue One. i've been a Star Wars fan my entire life. i've watched these movies more times than i can count ever since i was 6 years old. my dad saw the original trilogy in theaters WHEN IT CAME OUT. he saw every Star Wars movie in theaters when they came out. I have the fan DNA in my body, it's passed down through him. i got to see this with him, and sitting there watching a new Star Wars movie on the big screen felt special. maybe that's why all the discourse just bounces off me. because while people were busy writing essays about why i shouldn't enjoy it, i was busy crying five times and having an amazing experience with my dad. ​this movie reminded me why i fell in love with Star Wars in the first place. ​THIS IS THE WAY.