Bottoms

clear my throat “You know what? I’m good ‘cause it’s not gonna happen for me. If it’s not happening here, then it’s definitely not happening in Emerson, okay? I’m done trying to sow my damn oats : I’m packing up my vagina and I’m fucking Mathieu. That’s the only hope for me. It’s me and Mathieu, man. And ‘cause he’s gay and fearless, he’s probably gonna fuck me without protection. And then I’m gonna get pregnant, we're gonna have to join a church: he'll be the gay pastor, my whole life’s fucked! And yeah, sure, his sermons are good but everybody knows he’s fruity. Everybody knows he’s fucking fruity! By the way, our son, Hezekiah, hates us because he knows we’re both closeted. But we try to make it work for him but he’s not happy and yeah, guess what? The Deacon’s fucking the Evangelist, man! He’s fucking the Evangelist! I don’t wanna like that… Will you please come and visit us on Sundays? Please, please come and visit us on Sundays. “ brilliant. utterly brilliant.