Bugcrush
Rewatching after have read the original short story, with it sat in front of me as I write this like it’s holy scripture.
“And you know what the best thing is?” “You brought them here”“I fucking brought them here.”
GOD. After having read the original I can say that despite how.. grimey and cold and disturbing and pitiless this short film feels, the original story is entirely fucking. Ruthless. It does Not hold back. And that is not a critique of this adaptation! Smith’s iteration feels almost kinder, holding more innocence – though they still have that core feeling of wanting to be wanted So badly, with the original story’s Ben almost Wanting to be a victim. There is multiple instances which in he recognises and Enjoys the danger in his situation. In this film the red flags you see are more brief, subtle things that most people would push to the side, literally being whispered. Ben’s friends tell him that Grant is bad news, this and who he hangs around with, his bug necklace and the eerie whispers are the only sign of something bad to come. In the original you see this times Ten. Those red flags are bigger, essentially screaming at Ben to Back Away. Every sign that something bad is coming is there, and Ben ignores it.* His subconscious even paints this picture of Grant directly to him, and he continues to ignore it. Saying this, I do not blame Ben. I see myself in him so much. It is so easy to worm (literally. 🪱 ) your way into this kind of situation, to get comfortable in danger and not realise the severity of it until it’s too late.
* “What was even more peculiar was that at least once a week, Shannon and Keith would bring a third boy along with them. Always someone different, this rotating third youth tended to be cleaner and younger than the rest of the entourage . . . His goal was simple: he wanted to be the third boy that Shannon, Keith, and Grant left the school grounds with . . . The voice inside, finally articulate, simply said “don’t.” So succinct and abrupt, it sounded like Ben’s own voice and caught him off guard.”
Smith’s Bugcrush is kind, choosing to still be gross but changing key story points to Be kinder to the viewer and choose to focus on aspects like the bugs, and the “body-horror,” something I have seen him to be fond of. Focusing on how it is to be a queer person when liking the idea of someone but not Truly knowing them, the only way to find out by (potentially) putting yourself in danger. Then on the other hand Treleavan’s Bugcrush focuses on being a queer person and Knowing that a person is bad news and yet.. not caring because it is so hard to find people like you. Willing to put yourself at danger just in the hopes of being seen and loved by someone. It’s twisted and complex, but blatantly spelling out the theme of this story to you, which the short film relies a lot more on implication. They both leave you sitting in different kinds of dread. When you watch Bugcrush, you mainly just Hear the worst of what is happening to Ben before it switches to the credits. It lets you sit in it for a few seconds before music plays. When you read Bugcrush the last two lines are “There was nothing he could do but try to shut his eyes and concentrate on the warmth of the body that was now lying on top of him. He hoped it was Grant.” Both so sick and discomforting, yet they make you experience that in such different ways. One feels like genuine innocence and the other chosen ignorance, and this is why I Love seeing every version of a story. I love getting to see every adaptation, every style choice, every change of tone. It was also so wonderful to get to see more of Ben’s perspective and the details of What was going on in the original too, bury I understand it would’ve been a Lot to include in such a short runtime.
Having now experienced both I can say my appreciation for what I consumed first has grown, and I now have a great fondness for the original story. I don’t think it’s always a bad idea to stray from the original text, and this is a prime example to me of what is appropriate, and what works. I am Not good with words, and I tend to be quiet repetitive, I’m Probably just saying a whole lotta nothing but. God I fucking love Bugcrush. What a fucking gross & terrible story. It’s so wonderful. There’s so much I could say about it but I truly do not have the words for it. (Also, writing a review this long is new & embarrassing to me. AAGGH!!!!)
I can also say now more than ever that. Yeah. Ben is me. Gulp.
🪱🐛🪲🐛🪱