What the fuck was Rob Reiner smoking?I've been avoiding this for years now, but Reiner's shocking passing, and my apparent impromptu exploration of Dan Aykroyd's filmography, pushed me to watch this. 'North' is very much a reputation movie, infamous for spawning Roger Ebert's tirade of "I hated this movie. Hated hated hated hated hated this movie"; also, a Nostalgia Critic review I watched on loop when I was 10. Did it live up to its reputation? Is it as bad as everybody says it is? Is this a hidden gem? Yes, yes, and no.
This movie is fucking cursed; this is the only film role of Brynn Hartman, who went on to murder her husband, Bill Hartman. I'm glad that Rob Reiner was ultimately happy with this movie, but this is so confused and unfunny while trying to have heart; difficult for a movie where Bruce Willis talks about his genitals to a young Elijah Wood. Given that 95% of this movie is a dream, this confirms that North is one of the most racist characters in cinematic history. The stereotypes here are genuinely astounding, and never feel like satire.
Dan Aykroyd and Reb McIntire play Pa and Ma Texas, who dress as cowboys, love guns, eat lots of ribs, and sing a musical number set to the Bonanza theme. The Hawaiian characters talk about how little they know about the alphabet and put up a tourism billboard that shows a 12-year-old Elijah Wood's ass. Graham Greene and Kathy Bates in brownface play Alaskins who live in Igloos, and push their older relatives in the ocean on blocks of ice. Most Amish people are named Ezikel, and they mock them for not having electricity. There is so much here involving Chinese, African, and French stereotypes that this seems like it was written by somebody who was demented.
This movie tries to dabble in the surreal while mixing sentimentality, but it always comes across as artificial. This is such an awkward, distilled, and entitled experience. Elijah Wood is fine, but pretty much everybody around him is phoning it in. I love Rob Reiner too much to rate this any lower. He gave us so many incredible movies, and 'North' is... definitely not one of them.
