C.I.Ape

There’s something so greatly wrong in the idea that this is a film released in 2021, mainly because it feels like a film that should have landed in the bargain bins of Walmarts everywhere fifteen years earlier. The CGI looks outdated and without weight, the writing is awful and cliche, and the sound editing makes this feel like a really weak episode of Big Time Rush. There is very little worth talking about with this film outside of the usual “the camera work is competent” compliment, which is such a low bar you almost wish that was weird enough itself to make this interesting. What a waste of a perfectly absurd premise and title.

There’s something so greatly wrong in the idea that this is a film released in 2021, mainly because it feels like a film that should have landed in the bargain bins of Walmarts everywhere fifteen years earlier. The CGI looks outdated and without weight, the writing is awful and cliche, and the sound editing makes this feel like a really weak episode of Big Time Rush. There is very little worth talking about with this film outside of the usual “the camera work is competent” compliment, which is such a low bar you almost wish that was weird enough itself to make this interesting. What a waste of a perfectly absurd premise and title.

The Alpha Dog goes from loitering to loitering with intent to world domination. This is why you never do drugs. Loitering was Big Dog's gateway drug. Even Alpha Dog (who has that dog in him) can be made blind to what's important... family.

So bad that it's good, would unironically recommend.

The Alpha Dog goes from loitering to loitering with intent to world domination. This is why you never do drugs. Loitering was Big Dog's gateway drug. Even Alpha Dog (who has that dog in him) can be made blind to what's important... family.

So bad that it's good, would unironically recommend.

this movie is truly something special i really need more c.i. ape

this movie is truly something special i really need more c.i. ape

Did Kojima write this?

Did Kojima write this?

was going to do some joke five star review but this was actually so dogshit

was going to do some joke five star review but this was actually so dogshit