Ricardo was once Sara, a homeless HIV positive transvestite, living in the underbelly of Manhattan. Today he is a churchgoing, married man, "saved" by a Dallas ministry. He has renounced his homosexuality, but is his conversion complete? Susana Aiken and Carlos Aparicio offer an intimate look at Ricardo's transformation.
Directed by Susana Aikin and Carlos Aparicio
aids
homophobia
dallas, texas
sex change
hiv
evangelical christianity
lgbt
woman director
born again christian
transphobia
conversion to christianity
transgender
trans women
de-transition
Trailer
IMDB
N/A
Letterboxd
3.8 / 5
Crew
Susana Aikin
Director
Carlos Aparicio
Director
Susana Aikin
Editor
Carlos Aparicio
Director of Photography
Susana Aikin
Producer
Carlos Aparicio
Producer
Popular Reviews
4 reviews
Noah
7.6★ · 04/24/25
This was so sad but also the most insane thing ever
This was so sad but also the most insane thing ever
Spence
9.0★ · 07/23/24
Finding out he was HIV+ affected his mind. He grew afraid of dying alone in the street. The church was the only way out… the only chance he had to take care of himself… because in the street it would have been impossible. Profoundly sad. If your only options are to live authentically and die sick on the street or to deny your true nature and gain a community, a house, and a marriage, what do you choose? I’m glad the documentarians showed both Sara/Ricardo and Hugo’s lives after detransition as well as Giovana and Gigi’s lives as they continued to live their lives out as transgender women.
It’s just so awful to see how manipulative the Christian leaders like Terry are to people in poverty and harsh living conditions. They take advantage of the most vulnerable populations, holding aide just over their heads. You can hear it in their words:
You know we love you, right? And now we’ve got a place for you.With the underlying subtext of “…As long as you turn to God. As long as you pretend to be a man. As long as you pretend to be attracted to women.”
This conditional help, conditional love, promises nothing but misery for those who take it. This is solidified with Sara’s final quote of the film,
If I could change my life right now— even now, that I have my wife and everything— I would choose to be a woman.Giovana’s family understood what true love is. Edwin and Gigi understood. It is such a shame how rare that is.
Finding out he was HIV+ affected his mind. He grew afraid of dying alone in the street. The church was the only way out… the only chance he had to take care of himself… because in the street it would have been impossible. Profoundly sad. If your only options are to live authentically and die sick on the street or to deny your true nature and gain a community, a house, and a marriage, what do you choose? I’m glad the documentarians showed both Sara/Ricardo and Hugo’s lives after detransition as well as Giovana and Gigi’s lives as they continued to live their lives out as transgender women.
It’s just so awful to see how manipulative the Christian leaders like Terry are to people in poverty and harsh living conditions. They take advantage of the most vulnerable populations, holding aide just over their heads. You can hear it in their words:
You know we love you, right? And now we’ve got a place for you.With the underlying subtext of “…As long as you turn to God. As long as you pretend to be a man. As long as you pretend to be attracted to women.”
This conditional help, conditional love, promises nothing but misery for those who take it. This is solidified with Sara’s final quote of the film,
If I could change my life right now— even now, that I have my wife and everything— I would choose to be a woman.Giovana’s family understood what true love is. Edwin and Gigi understood. It is such a shame how rare that is.
Sarah
9.1★ · 06/03/24
so heartbreaking to see these survivors, out of desperation, be taken advantage of and exploited
so heartbreaking to see these survivors, out of desperation, be taken advantage of and exploited
